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Posted 10th May 2007, terribly early in the morning

I'm sure most of you already know about how my mom was in the hospital for about a month because of a heart attack and a stroke. I heard a few different stories about what happened before I finally heard what actually happened from her doctor. It turns out that the heart attack and the stroke both were from her taking a lot of benadryl, and because she had narcotics in her system. I've been trying to help her out as much as I can, and I already made her call about starting a rehab program when she first got out, which should start sometime soon. Right now she's staying with her sister since she really has no place to live. She's actually been doing a lot better lately.

Anyway, the point of me saying this is because I keep hearing about how she's such a bad person because of the mistakes she's made. And she's really not. I think what she did was stupid, and it's still hard for me to believe that she would actually do something like that, but I'm not ashamed of her. Still, I've been hearing things from people that I thought I could confide in about how my family is screwed up and how they're not sure they even want to know me, and they keep bringing up the subject even though they know it bothers me. But I guess that's the whole point. My mom did something really stupid. And she almost died because of it. But I'll never make the same mistakes she did. There are a lot of things I know I'll never do because I know what it's like to be around it, or I know what can happen because of it.

I guess the point of me writing all of this is just that I'm really tired of people trying to say I'm hiding things and trying to make me feel bad about things that are beyond my control. If anyone thinks any less of me after reading this then I guess there's nothing I can do about that. I just think it's stupid that I have to keeping hearing all these weird comments from people.

5 Comments

Posted by sammx32, 1 hour, 9 minutes after the fact (Report user)

I remember you telling me alot of things about your family problems ... and knowing you over 3 years now I've been through alot of things personally and have been really upset by what I saw when there ...I remember my mom coming to take you in 11:30 at night when it was like 25 degrees out ... I know its hard to understand why people back away sometimes ... but things like what your going through scare people .. and as bad as the world is people don't really want to add to thier own messed up situations and some just want a normal life without drugs or abuses involved ... sometimes your own personal situations are just to much for average people to digest ...I think thats why they have counselers and rehab ... it's thier job to help families and victims of substance abuse .. so rehab is a good thing ... is your Dad still not helping? ... it would be less of a burden on you if your Dad helped her so you could concentrate on school and work ... your Mom has 3 kids to get better for so I think if everyone helps and lets her see that.. she'll do better in rehab ... we're discussing self esteem in class right now and how many kids loss it because of family issues and just plain harrasement from outsiders ... he has us value who we are by constantly reminding us we have to think "we are the best we can be" and acting toward that in action in daily life ... so far its helped for me with issues I have with my Dad and a couple people I deal with in class ... I think thats the idea with rehab ... to build self esteem again ... and the get togethers I told you about at the church for kids of abusers will help you get stronger to help your Mom and get you through this with other kids who are dealing with the same thing ... if you message me... I can give you the phone number ... I looked it up when you first told me about your Mom and why she was sick ...and the meeting areas are close ...so you won't have to travel far ... Good luck and keep in touch :)

Posted by Junior, 2 hours, 15 minutes after the fact (Report user)

Wes...I am proud of you for just comming out and letting everyone know ur business....another thing if people r so worried that u will turn out like ur mom juss dont let iit bother u show them wrong...then u will b able 2 say I am nothing like her....I've heard so many things like that...my parents were heavy drinkers...people in my family say I am gonna b juss like that...I cant drink 2 get drunk becuz I am afraid of getting mean like they did when they was drunk or I dont have the urge 2 drink...but just show people ur not going to follow in her foot steps...

Posted by Pure-Metal-Cindy, 4 hours, 52 minutes after the fact (Report user)

Wes, my family put the FUN in dysFUNction. The more I learn about the perfect families around me, the less perfect I discover they really are. Transparency is really the only difference between the perfect families and those that are screwed up.

Posted by ray, 5 hours, 27 minutes after the fact (Report user)

You have nothing to feel bad about. But you have a lot to feel proud about. You're trying to help your mother set her life straight, without being judgemental, and that's the dictionary meaning of love. Also remember: When people try to capitalize on painful situations by saying hurtful things or demanding explinations, it simply means they're trying to find comfort in someone else's distress since their lives are so much worse.

Posted by happydaisy, 5 days, 4 hours after the fact (Report user)

You should be proud. You are being the person that your mother needs. It all comes down to...don't let what other people think, say or feel about your own sitution. It is your own. Even the person that seems to have it all together has something dysfunctional about them. I for one don't want to be perfect...That is no fun at all. Make life what you want it to be and learn from the past. I know it is rough being so strong for the people you love. Just know that it is all worth it. Because when it comes down to it those people are the ones that will be for you when you need them.

busy

Posted 12th June 2007, late evening

As the title may or may not suggest, I have been incredibly busy lately. Mostly working. I've been working at Kings Island since they opened and I'm starting to feel like I live there. And I just swit...

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